A Response:

I have been lucky enough to experience love.

It is a feeling that separates you from the world; you are no longer cognizant of the million other things that are waiting to be done - the million other things that have been waiting to be done.

You are able to escape the term papers, the presentations, and the expectations. Love lets you escape all the stress and dissolve into something lucid and perfect, the world you've created with the person you love.

And, you're right, being with the one you love - that interaction- is unjust; as soon as the interaction stops, you are torn from the comfort and returned to a place where nothing seems to work out, happiness is unexpected, and everything you do seems like a mistake. You return to the real world.

El dia de gracias

To begin, I hope that everyone has had a happy thanksgiving day - including those of you who boycott it for historical protest.

My day has been just fine. I decided to sleep in and then took a 3 hour nap. Apparently, I was tired.

The ignition for the oven broke. So, after my mother prepared dinner at my uncle's home, we ate a typical thanksgiving meal. Sadly, that was the first family meal that we have all had together in months. The conversation wasn't great, but it was nice to hear what everyone was thankful for.

To end, I hope everyone has something or someone that they are grateful for.

Love Songs

Favorite lyrics:

"I had to find you, tell you I need you, tell you I set you apart." Coldplay

"I need you so much closer." Death Cab for Cutie

"Time goes by so slowly, and time can do so much. Are you still mine? I need your love. I need your love. God speed your love to me." The Righteous Brothers

"Would you know my name, if I saw you in heaven?" Eric Clapton

"Someday if all my prayers are answered, I'll hear a footstep on the stair- With anxious heart I'll hurry to the door and maybe you'll be there." Diana Krall

"Anyplace you wanna go, know I'll be next to you." Dave Matthews Band

"A thousand miles seems pretty far, but they've got planes and trains and cars - I'd walk to you if I had no other way. Our friends would all make fun of us, we'd just laugh along because we know none of them have felt this way." Plain White T's

"You've been the only thing that's right, in all I've done. I can barely look at you, but every single time I do, I know we'll make it anywhere from here." Snow Patrol

"I am thinking it's a sign that the freckles in our eyes are mirror images and, when we kiss, they're perfectly aligned." Iron and Wine

"Let me know that you need me. Let that be enough." Switchfoot

"You give your hand to me and then you say hello. And I can hardly speak, my heart is beating so." Ray Charles

" In a haze, a stormy haze, I'll be round. I'll be loving you always." Coldplay

"When the storm comes, you shelter me. I don't say a word and you know exactly what I mean. In the darkest times you shine on me. You set me free. Steady as we go." Dave Matthews Band

"I can't take my eyes off you. I can't my eyes off you. I can't my eyes off you." Damien Rice

"I wanna live life and never be cruel. I wanna live life and be good to you." Coldplay

"You do something wonderful, to chase it all away. . .You do something to me, something deep inside." Paul Weller

"I came here with a load and it feels so much lighter, now that I met you. And honey you should know that I could never go on without you." Coldplay

Exams, Elections, and Ecclesiastes

This week has been a strange mix of joy, excitement, stress, and frustration. I have had an exam everyday this week. And, unfortunately, there was little more I could have done to prepare for it - although, we all know that isn't the honest truth. I could have made more time. Regardless, these exams have contributed a significant amount of stress to my life. After this week, however, exams will be done for a while and I will be able to preoccupy myself with other important tasks attached to fast-approaching deadlines.

While this is schedule has been frustrating, I have found some relief. The recent elections have been a well-spring of excitement for me. I had hoped and told myself that the Democrats would be able to take the Hill, but I wasn't absolute. It's very difficult to believe they actually did it. I'm afraid someone cheated. I don't want to think that they would, but it seems so surreal that they gained a majority in the Senate (two of those seats, however, are actually held by Independents, who said they will caucus with the Democrats). In addition, Donald Rumsfeld has resigned at the request of our military leaders in Iraq. Let's hope that Bush's nominee makes some intelligent and necessary changes to the U.S. approach to Iraq. Overall, American politics over the last week has left me with a uncharacteristic positive feeling.

During this week I have spent a lot of time fulfilling extra-curricular obligations. One, last night, was the Center for Responsible Leadership Seminar with West Cosgrove. His message was different than what I have heard from other speakers. His proposal is that to improve leadership, we all need to voluntarily knock ourselves down and experience suffering. By doing this we broaden our understanding of being human - we become more whole. I agree.

While I was reflecting on his advice, I came across this:
For in much wisdom is much grief: and he that increaseth knowledge increaseth sorrow. Ecclesiastes 1:18

To me this points out a valuable lesson: To learn we must experience grief and sorrow. And, conversely, knowledge brings sorrow. When we leave our ignorance we have a responsibility. West talked about how many people in the United States are scared of knowing how people suffer in the developing world because of the guilt that comes along with it. I think that, while it is true that knowing reality is burdened with grief and guilt, the joy and peace you gain when you reach out to help those who are suffering is infinitely stronger. To know suffering, to be surrounded by it, is important to experience. But, I think it is silly to avoid suffering because of your own guilt and fear. I wish everyone could trust that while the experience is difficult, the rewards that come from it are so much more valuable.

Weakness. . .

"Weakness of attitude becomes weakness of character." - Albert Einstein

I am guilty. I am guilty of judging others quickly and severely for weaknesses I see in them. When an individual has doubt in their heart, feels he or she to be uncapable, or gives up - I struggle to maintain respect for that individual. It is tragic for me to see so many people that think so little of themselves. It is equally tragic to see so many others that degrade others to stay balanced on their own feet.

Anyone who knows what "type D" means - will know that this inability to accept weakness is characteristic of dominant personalities like my own. Anyone who is a "D" can understand why I am sick of people failing; I am sick of people not participating; I am sick of people settling! If you want to live a life feeling sorry for yourself, that is your choice, but I cannot promise that I will be able to tolerate you for very long.

The most universal manifestation of weakness is in attitude. Albert Einstein's quote expresses, in my opinion, the the essence of weakness - peoples' outlooks are staining their characters. I see people everyday who seem not to care - who go day to day without any belief in themselves. These people prevade negativity and pollute the world with their fragility.

Although, I realize I should not judge others for anything. I am struggling not to walk up to these individuals and yell:

"Get a freaking backbone!"